Help The Reader See What You See In Your Head

Most writers can see their story unfold in their head before they put it on paper. But, do we show that to our readers? Sensory detail can make the reader see what we saw as we wrote the story. We need to make them feel what we felt. When we do this, we plop them right into the story, as if they are living it. Sensory detail is so important in making that happen.

Below are some examples of adding sensory detail that helps our readers live the story.

No sensory detail: It was hot and smelly in the cafe.

Sensory detail added: An ancient overhead fan above my head pushed the oppressive heat down around me while my nose was pummeled with the pungent smell of unknown spices.

No sensory detail: We walked through the forest rapidly.

Sensory detail: Our feet plunged deep into the lush grass as we walked. Hundreds of birds called out their irritation at our presence. In the distance, a thunderous growl made us quicken our steps.

Which story would you rather read?

Hoping to add sensory detail so my readers will live the story, Gloria


6 responses to “Help The Reader See What You See In Your Head

  1. Very interesting! You caught my attention. I want to know what happens next.

  2. Thanks, Veronica. That is always encouraging to an author!!! 😀


  3. Nice job, Gloria! I was walking through that lush grass with you, and the growl scared me to death!

  4. Sherri, with your vivid imagination (which, by the way, is why you are such a great writer) I can imagine you were knee deep in it!!!! 😀

  5. Shirley Shibley

    Good examples, Gloria, but also good reminders that our readers can’t see what we see or smell or hear unless we tell them with the words.


  6. Shirley, you always do a great job of putting us right in the middle of the stor!.


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